Dear Mom and Dad,

I'm sorry to be so long in writing. Unfortunately all my stationary was destroyed the night our dorm was set on fire by the demonstrators. I'm out of the hospital now and the doctors say my eyesight should return sooner or later. The wonderful boy, Bill, who rescued me from the fire kindly offered to share his little apartment with me until the dorm was rebuilt. He comes from a good family so you won't be surprised, Mom, when I tell you we're going to be married. In fact, since you've always wanted a grandchild, you'll be glad to know that next month you'll be grandparents."

On the bottom of the letter it said, "Please disregard the above practice in English composition. There was no fire. I haven't been in the hospital. I'm not pregnant. I don't even have a steady boyfriend. But I did get a "D" in French and an "F" in Chemistry and I wanted to be sure that you received this news in the proper perspective.